Archive for Ghost

The Crooked Man Cometh

Posted in Ghost/Demon, Uncategorized with tags , , , , on June 14, 2016 by dtrain1008

conjuringpostersmall

The Conjuring 2

GREETINGS, friends, and welcome once again to your source for spooky… The Cathedral is back in business, and this time we’re taking a look at a fresh movie on the block. The Conjuring 2 made its terrifying debut this weekend, and after hearing four separate people give positive reviews, I knew I had to see this one.  Now know this… The first Conjuring was one of few movies to get a perfect score on this blog, so needless to say that’s a tough act to follow. And Horror movie sequels in general don’t often succeed, as it were. So I was VERY glad to see this one deliver… Anyway, let’s get into it.

It’s the mid-1970’s, and Ed & Lorraine Warren are investigating one of their darkest, most sinister cases ever in Amityville, New York. The aftermath of that event has left psychological scars on Lorraine. Enough to the point that she’s unwilling to take on any new cases. But elsewhere in the world, a struggling mother is witnessing something happening to her daughter. She’s speaking with the voice of an old man. She’s claiming that someone, or something, is intruding on her room in the night. And her house is slowly getting trashed by an evil spirit.  But she’s probably faking it, right? …….. Right?

I’m wondering how long it’ll take for James Wan to be recognized as one of the better horror directors in history. He’s already the director and/or producer of The Conjuring, Insidious, Saw (and sequels), and Dead Silence. And he’s got a strong docket still coming, including Lights Out, and mulitple Insidious sequels. The dude is legit.  And admittedly, there seems like a very similar tone between the Conjuring and Insidious movies, but they have their differences, and at the end of the day, they’re both pretty damn scary. And that’s the bottom line.

Back to business. Say 10 Hail Mary’s and let’s go in for A Closer Look

Villain: A sinister demon. That’s all you get.

How do I Stop It?: As is the case with the first movie, this is a foul, horrible beast. You’ll need some serious help if you’re confronted with this one.

Lessons Learned: Ok. How do I get this to sink in? Spirit boards are generally not a good idea. So making a spirit board… that’s an even worse idea. If there’s a way to communicate with the dead, leave it to the pros, eh? And another thing. Should you have a nightmare of a particularly creepy spirit, you shouldn’t EVER feel the need to make a painting of said spirit, and hang it on your effing wall! EVER. FO RILL.

Who Do I Watch With?: Anyone who’s up for a good, clean, scary movie. I do recommend bringing someone though. This one’s pretty spooky.

Movie Trivia: On the first day of shooting, an actual priest was brought in to bless the set (creepy trivia!). Also, James Wan turned down an unknown (but claimed to be very large) amount of money to direct Fast 8, in order to direct The Conjuring 2. \m/  \m/

Rating the Flick

Villain: 10/10. Wow this thing is nuts. As good as the demon in the first movie was, I think this one was even scarier. Wan really had a great design for the character(s), and I’m sure they’ll certainly be in a lot of upcoming nightmares.

Scare Factor: Palms doth sweateth (9/10)

This is a pretty long movie by horror standards, and while there are a few slow parts here and there, the scares are also there, the whole time. Be warned, this is a very scary movie.

Gore Rating: Barely Bloody Machete (1/5)

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Not much to worry about here. Similar to the first one, basically no gore involved, but as Mr. Wan has shown us, it’s not needed to get you jumping in these films.

Overall Rating: 5/5 Reclinerschairs

….because Chairs! Yes, another perfect score. And I dare say (I dare, I dare!) that The Conjuring 2 is even better than the first movie. It’s just… really really good. The plot development is great, there’s good foreshadowing, subtle references to other films in the saga, and most importantly, straight up scary stuff. Really really solid film here. I don’t really know what else to say, so I think I’m just going to end it on that. If you get a chance, SEE THIS MOVIE IN THEATERS. It’s worth the ticket price.

So that’ll wrap up this review. As it turns out, there’s more horror movies being released in the coming months, so stay tuned. Never know what you might see on here… Oh, and I’ll leave you with this…

Until next time, say your prayers.

-Dvo

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I See My Frans

Posted in Ghost/Demon with tags , , , , on February 8, 2016 by dtrain1008

unfriended_poster Unfriended

Alright chums, let’s do this thing! The now seldomly-opened cathedral has creaked open its decaying doors, and the scares are back. What really sucks is that I’ve watched three or four horror movies in the last few months, but it’s been a hot minute since I saw them, and I wouldn’t feel right posting an out-dated review.  So this week we’re going over the one I saw most recently, Unfriended.

Unfriended is the story of a group of teenagers who witness the horrific suicide of one of their classmates, and friends.  Fast forward one year later, and the group of friends has done a pretty good job of moving on.  But one girl is still coping with the loss of her good friend, unbeknownst to the rest of the group.  Anyway, they get together on a skype call one evening (apparently skype is the AIM of 2015?) to hang out.  But there’s an unknown guest on the call as well… and this unknown guest is making some scary threats. And what’s going on with their computers? Dun dun DUNNNNNNN.

HANG UP DAT VIDEO CONFERENCE… and let’s log in for A Closer Look

Villain: A sinister spirit seeking virtual vengeance (+1 for alliteration combo!)

How Do I Stop It?: Well, two ways. First, be a decent human being. I know, I know. Really solid advice. And second? Shut it down!

Lessons Learned: Posting shame videos of your friends on the internet isn’t the way to go, kids. This message is brought to you by famous people everywhere. And Mexico. I think the real lesson is that social media is the devil. Damn you, Zuckerberg.

Who Do I Watch With?: Well hopefully if you’re watching this, you’re either a horror junkie, or a 15-year old kid on a date.  This is a classic teen romp.

Movie Trivia: All of the facebook and skype accounts in the movie exist, and can be found on their respective sites. Also the whole movie was completed as one long shot, with the actors on real computers in separate rooms of a house.

Rating the Flick

Villain: 1/10. This villain is one step short of a Wayans Bros. movie. It’s like Jigsaw from Saw had a teenage kid, but rather than come up with clever torture traps, he/she was just an internet troll. Do better, horror filmmakers.

Scare Factor: 3/10. As far as scares go, there aren’t many. I’ll admit it’s mildly entertaining to see how the story shakes out and watch these kids suffer, but at the end of the day it’s just not very scary.

Gore Rating: Barely Bloody Machete (1/5)

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Just a touch of blood in here, as there’s one or two slightly gruesome scenes. But for the most part Unfriended is pretty tame.

Overall Rating: 0/5 AIM Away Messagesaway_message Because we should all reflect on the best messaging software that ever was. Regardless of those CDs that AOL would send you in the mail. See, this is why this movie is bad. I can’t even talk about the horror. I just want to talk about Netscape Navigator and trollface. Unfriended is Unworthy of this blog, and yet here I am. Must be winter.

That’ll wrap up this review, but stay tuned. Who knows, maybe 3 months from now I’ll be back, hopefully with a much scarier movie.  But in the meantime, feel free to throw some horror recommendations my way! Hope you’re all staying warm this winter.

-Dvo

 

Ghosts on TV

Posted in Ghost/Demon, Uncategorized with tags , , , on December 7, 2015 by dtrain1008

poltergeist_poster Poltergeist

Well I successfully took about a month off, but it’s time to re-open the doors to the Cathedral, kids. Welcome back yet again to the Unholy Cathedral, (hopefully) your source for all things that go bump in the night. This week we’re taking a look at Poltergeist, the 2015 re-make of the Craig T. Nelson (of Coach fame) film from the 1980’s.

I should start by saying that while many think of Poltergeist as a classic, I was never a big fan of the original.  I think the original is more silly than scary, so I was hoping that this reboot would bring a modern approach and some legitimate scares… how’d it do? Let’s jump in.

Poltergeist is the story of a down-on-their-luck family who gets a great deal on a new house. Almost too good to be true, one might say.  But they’re trying to get a fresh start with this new home.  The good news? The place is in a nice, modern subdivision. The bad? The parents soon learn about a morbid history of their neighborhood at a dinner party, and when they return home, the kids are in real bad shape.  At least those of them who are still there… Well damn.

Let’s jump behind the screen for A Closer Look

Villain: Evil Spirits trying to lure a young girl to them so they can find new life

How do I Stop Them?: Well… hopefully you’re smart enough to recognize a bad situation when you see it, and therefore can make conscious decisions about when you’re being tricked. But should you fall into this trap… I hope you’ve got a good friend who knows their paranormal stuff.

Lessons Learned: Well, if a house is selling for a price that seems too good to be true, there’s likely a reason for it.  Ask the question, all you home buyers! And for goodness sake, if you have a family of 5 and both parents are unemployed, try just a LITTLE financial responsibility. Not that that has anything to do with being haunted. That’s just sound advice. And finally, if you move into a house that has random clown dolls hidden in a secret room behind a wall? GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE.

Who Do I Watch With?: I’d recommend that if you’re gonna watch this one, it should be with someone who’s seen the original. Or just has a penchant for not-great horror.

Movie Trivia: The movie trivia this week is pretty sad, which I guess is par for the course with this one. But one of the lead actresses admitted in a Q&A that she’d never seen the original film until this one had completed production.

Rating the Flick

Villain: 3/10. Most of you know that I’m more into the paranormal movies than slashers, so this should be an easy win for me. But alas, the evil entity is just not scary whatsoever, and it’s also not very creative.

Scare Factor: 3/10. I had to conceded a few points. The “development” phase of the movie was actually decent, with a few creepy moments. But once the thing is revealed and we see the “other side,” it’s just not scary whatsoever.

Gore Rating: Clean Machete (0/5)

0_5_machete

Not a drop of blood on that thing! Look at it, just glistening over there, waiting to hack up some unfortunate soul.  It’ll have to wait for the next movie.  Poltergeist holds back on the blood, as well as the scares.

Overall Rating: 0.5 Flatscreen Televisions

tvs This one is pretty rough from start to finish. And they tried to put in some subtle “homages” to the original, but they really just invoke lots of headshaking and facepalming. The dad is trying to be a Coach. Sigh. And the school where he’s trying to become the coach? It’s named after the director of the original. Someone stick a fork in this one.

On a COMPLETE side note that is unrelated to this post, something else that needs a fork stuck in it– The Walking Dead.  My crusade against this season is growing stronger. It’s awful.

In any case, tread carefully when it comes to Poltergeist. It’s got about 2 good moments. When you’re trying to market your movie based on a prop that’s used only in a few scenes, you’re doing it wrong.  May I instead recommend Annabelle?

That’s going to wrap up this Unholy review.  On another side note, I watched The Gallows last night, and Adam’s review a few months ago was pretty on-point.  Mildly entertaining for a while, but the end was incredibly cheesy.  I think I enjoyed it better than Poltergeist though. But there are more things scary coming, even in the Christmas season.  So stay tuned for more Unholy Happenings.

Until next time, stay warm.

-Dvo

Sinister Sequels

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on August 25, 2015 by dtrain1008

sinister2_poster

Sinister 2

Greetings all, and welcome once again to The Unholy Cathedral!  Your source for horror movie reviews is back open, and we’re approaching the end of summer, which can only mean one thing… Halloween season is on the horizon!  But first let’s get down to the film du jour… This one has been much-anticipated for most of the summer. If you follow the blog, you know I’m a huge fan of Sinister.  For my dollar, it’s one of the better modern horror movies.  So with the release of the sequel this weekend, I had to make the trip to the theater to see if a continuation could possibly hold up to the horrifying tale told in the first installment. How did it do? Let’s jump in and see what spooky things Blumhouse Productions has brought us this time.

Sinister 2 is the story of a former deputy who is following up on a chain of horrible murders that have taken place, seemingly the result of a paranormal entity.  The deputy is trying his best to end a pattern he’s seemingly uncovered, and get rid of the evil once and for all.  What’s he doing? Burning down houses, of course! Seriously though.  And as he makes some calls to realtors, it sounds like he’s in good shape, since the latest house is unoccupied, or so they tell him.  But as he shows up with his gasoline, things turn for the worse quickly.  Not only is the house occupied, but it’s a single mother with her two children.  Going to be a little more difficult this time.  And things get worse, as he begins to unravel the dark truth about the home… Bloody hell.

I was kind of torn by this movie.  There’s a lot of things I liked.  The very first scare in this movie really got me good, and I was ready for a few hours of pure terror.  But it kind of lost its mojo somewhere along the way.  Also, Bhughul is a little different this time around, and I think it’s a step back from the original.  More on that later.  Here’s the rub, though.  The first installment of this saga really did a great job of keeping us in a complete state of discomfort, the entire time.  This time around… there’s a little too much silliness.

This is no time to boogie… let’s go in for A Closer Look

Villain: Bhughul, a very Sinister demon.  I’m aware. Horrible pun.

How Do I Stop It?: Well, I won’t play spoiler here, but there are ways. The easiest solution though, is to do some research on a house if you plan on moving in.  If some family got horrifically murdered in a house, maybe consider a different one.  Seems reasonable, right?

Lessons Learned: Oh, so many.  I mean, first and foremost, see that last part.  Homes with dark histories aren’t worth it, kiddos.  Next, if some strange ghost kid wakes you up at night to watch some creep-ass movies in the basement, chances are he’s NOT trying to help you.  And most importantly, if you’re a kid and you’re seeing ghosts, then you might want to, I don’t know, tell someone?

Who Do I Watch With?: This one’s good for all ages I think.  Not too gory, nothing too adulterated, and if I’m being honest, not “too” scary.  Grab a friend and enjoy the flick.

Movie Trivia: The rural farmhouse setting is due to the movie being an homage to Stephen King’s Children of the Corn. Also, the protagonist, Deputy So & So, still does not get a name in this chapter of the saga.

Rating the Flick

Villain: 6/10. I think Bhughul takes a step back this time around.  Where the first movie had a lot of mystery about him, he becomes more visible, and less suspenseful, in this chapter.  It’s still a really creepy character, don’t get me wrong.  But the bar was set pretty high in the first of the Sinister movies.

Scare Factor: 6/10.  There’s some very good “gotchas” along the way, and there are some scary scenes.  But as a whole, it didn’t get me too bad.  When thinking back to the first, I was still scared when I got home from the theater.  This time around, I wasn’t that scared by the end credits.

Gore Rating: Moderately Bloody Machete (3/5)

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There’s some gore in the horrific movies that we’re forced to endure yet again, and really in one of them in particular.  If you can get through some creepy fake snuff flicks, then you’ll be ok.

Overall Rating: 3/5  8 mm Cameras

8mm

It’s certainly not the greatest movie, but I’ve also seen worse. Let’s start with the good things.  The snuff films are once again, the most disturbing parts of this movie.  Really creepy stuff, and they got pretty creative with the killings.  Bhughul is just naturally terrifying, even though he wasn’t executed as well in this one as the original.  And overall, the story wasn’t terrible.  Now as for the bad… there’s just gaping plot holes, particularly at the climax of the movie.  And there’s also a lot of dead time in the middle of the movie that I can do without.  Even though the snuff films themselves were ultra disturbing, it seemed like they tried too hard to make us watch them this time.  As a contrast, in the first one it was like a car wreck. You knew it was going to be horrible, but you kind of wanted to watch anyway.

An obvious thought is that the first movie set the bar so high, that there’s no way this one could live up to it.  And in some regards, I say sure.  And like I said, this is still not a “bad” movie.  But in terms of must-see horror, I wouldn’t put this in that category.  If you’re really craving some horror, I’d say it’s worth a rent when it hits Netflix/DVD.  The good news is that it looks like this year’s Halloween slate has a lot of potential for some real good scares. Keep your eyes peeled for some scary movies in the coming months.  And also stay tuned for a preview of the #Unholy trip to Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios.  Long story short, there’s a lot of content on the horizon.  Darkness is truly rising, my friends.

So that’ll wrap up this review.  May your days be shorter and your nights be full of terror.

Until next time, DON’T LOOK BACK.

-Dvo

All American Horror

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on July 5, 2015 by dtrain1008

Insidious3

Insidious 3

Greetings once again, all you ghoulies.  And welcome back to The Unholy Cathedral.  Don’t mind the creaky doors… this place hasn’t been used for quite some time.  But I’m back, and on the day after our great country’s birthday no less.  Let it be known… this is a dark blog, but it is also a big fan of the ol’ Red White and Blue.  Anyway, seeing as it’s a weekend for celebrating, I’m bringing you a special double-feature.  And it’s not 2 movies this time… it’s a movie, and a related event that took place in Chicago a few months ago.  So let’s jump right in and see what kind of terror we can get ourselves into.

First, let’s talk about the C2E2 event I went to a few months ago.  For those not familiar, C2E2 is the Chicago Comics and Entertainment Expo, that takes place annually in Chicago.  I had never been to this event, but this year my friend (who told me about The Purge: Breakout) showed me a promotion that was going on at C2E2 for the new Insidious prequel.  And the minute I saw the same set-up as the Purge event, I knew I had to do it.  So I bought a ticket and headed down to the big city.

We were told that this experience would be using Oculus Rift, the new virtual-reality headset technology that’s coming out.  But beyond that, we were kept in the dark as to what this event might be.  So I showed up to the event, which was a massive area within McCormick Place in Chicago.  I meandered past tons of people dressed in Cosplay (to my female readers, Harley Quinn outfits are A-okay with yours truly), and eventually met up with my friends and headed straight for the Insidious area.  After about a 30 minute wait, I was admitted into the “room.”

It began simple enough… some small animatronics and sound effects greeted me as I was in a small waiting area within the trailer.  Then a hostess told me to go to a room.  As I was on my way, a scareactor did his best to scare me, and then I found my room.  Still not knowing what the hell I was supposed to do, there was a TV in this dark, gritty room that began to play some creepy footage.  But basically it said that I’d be utilizing Oculus Rift, and kind of explained how to use it.  If you’re not aware of Oculus Rift, I recommend googling it.  In any case, the film ended, and one of the walls of my room opened up to the main event room, which was essentially just a person to oversee everything, and a chair for the brave souls looking to go “into the further.”

I sat down and put the headset on, and what happened next was just pure fun.  Basically it was a 4-D experience between the motion-enabled chair, a temperature-controlled room, some air cannons, and the Oculus Rift.  Think of a scary horror movie, and then think of actually being inside of it.  I think the cool part is that you’re in control of what you’re looking at, but you inevitably come face-to-face with some really scary ghosts and spirts.  It’s very well done, and more than anything, gets me excited to see where horror goes once Oculus Rift becomes more mainstream.  For something that takes only about 5 minutes, this was a very well-thought out experience.  And on the way out, they hit you with one more good scare.  And then they tell you how you die…..

So the C2E2 event got me even more excited for the movie, which came out a few weeks ago.  And being a fan of the Insidious saga, naturally I went on a week night for a quiet showing by myself.  I think the Insidious series is right up my alley… I’m more into paranormal horror than slashers, for the most part. And the first two did a pretty good job of tingling the old spine.  So let’s jump in to the 2nd part of this All-American double feature… Insidious 3.

Insidious 3 is the prequel to Insidious 1 and 2, and begins with a young girl who recently lost her mother.  Her father is doing his best to support his family in a difficult time, but she’s being relied upon more and more, as she’s starting to mature.  However, being a dumb girl, she girl reaches out, and attempts to contact her deceased mother.  And shockingly, it seems like she’s getting a response.  Great, right? Wrong. She sees a psychic, who warns her about contacting the dead. So she tries to stop.  But whatever she’s made contact with doesn’t want to stop. In fact, it’s becoming more aggressive… Oh hell… When will these chicks learn?

Finish off those fireworks, and let’s go in for A Closer Look.

Villain: A dark spirit trying to capture the soul of a young girl

How Do I Stop It?: This is another one where you’d have to really go out of your way to become imperiled by this thing, so I certainly hope none of you fall victim to this.  But if you do… I think the only option is to seek help.

Lessons Learned: For real, kids. Don’t try to contact the dead on your own.  Nothing good is gonna come out of that.  And always look both ways before crossing 🙂

Who Do I Watch With?: This one gets the USA (Unholy Stamp of Approval) for everyone to watch.  So as long as it’s someone who’s up for a good scare, you’re good to go.

Movie Trivia: In the movie, the psychic’s dog is named “Warren,” a nod to Ed & Lorraine Warren, the paranormal investigators featured in The Conjuring.  This is the first movie in this saga not directed by James Wan, as he was busy filming Furious 7.

Rating the Flick

Villain: 7/10.  In the Insidious saga, you kind of know what you’re going to get.  But I have to say they do a good job of keeping the story somewhat fresh, while still integrating some of the ghouls from the other movies.  The “bad guy” in this one is certainly creepy, and also pretty resilient.  Good stuff.

Scare Factor: 6/10.  This one didn’t really chill me to the bone, but there are definitely some good scares throughout.  Admittedly some of the good ones were seen in the previews, but they still delivered.

Gore Rating: Moderately Bloody Machete (3/5)

3_5_machete

This is a weird one.  It’s not a “bloody” movie, but there’s some reeeeallly messed up stuff during one or two scenes in particular.  Mostly dealing with broken bones and such.  It was enough to make me grimace and want to look away, so I have to give it at least a 3 on the gore rating.

Overall Rating: 3/5 Oxygen Masks

oxygen

Should you see the movie, you’ll understand.  The Insidious Saga has proven that at a minimum, it’s going to be solid.  Maybe they’re not legendary horror films, but they’re far from bad.  And they can definitely deliver the scares.  For those of you wondering, I think I’d rank them #2, #1, #3 in order from best to worst.  But don’t watch them out of order.  #2 is my favorite just because of the way it ties into the first.  And also it scared the hell out of me.

Insidious 3 is just another strong addition to the series, and I’ve heard a 4th movie is already being planned.  So keep your eyes peeled (or blended >:) ) for future sequels.  But given the amount of awesome thing this series has given to this blog (best haunted house @ Halloween Horror Nights Hollywood, Oculus Rift experience @ C2E2, and 3 movies), it’s got to be one of the better thought-of sagas since the Unholy Cathedral opened its doors.  So if you haven’t checked these movies out, give them a try.

That’ll wrap up this All-American double-shot of horror.  Now I’m off to carve into some things and devour some flesh. Yes, I’m talking about grilling out. Hope all of you Unholites had a fantastic 4th of July, and hopefully we’ll be seeing you soon…

Until next time, watch out for those sharks.

-Dvo

A Walk in the Park

Posted in Ghost/Demon with tags , , , on March 29, 2015 by dtrain1008

It-Follows-Movie-Poster

It Follows

Well hello there, and welcome to The Unholy Cathedral, and to those of you returning, welcome back.  For my loyal readers, you’ve probably noticed that I haven’t been posting too much lately, but hopefully that’ll change soon.  In any case, I finally got around to seeing a scary movie! This one was way off my radar until a few weeks ago, but then I saw an article about “It Follows,” an Indie horror flick that was getting some great reviews.

I was able to track down a movie trailer for it online, but other than a few creepy clips, the trailer doesn’t really give much away at all in terms of what the movie is about.  Nonetheless, I went to see if there were showtimes, but there was nothing in the area; that is, until this weekend.  So I went to the theater today, and was pretty pleased overall.  The movie offers a very simple concept, but it’s certainly creepy in its own right, so no complaints here.  It’s a creepy film all the way through, and delivers a good amount of scares. So let’s jump in and take a look at what’s gonna be Following us around.

“It Follows” is the story of a young Michigan woman, Jay,  who has recently met a new guy.  She goes on a few dates with him, and eventually they hook up in his car.  But then things take a dark turn…  She awakens bound to a wheelchair in an abandoned building, as he’s seemingly patrolling the area.  He seems to have lost his mind.  He’s saying something about some “thing” that has been following him around.  But it must be nonsense, right?  He’s clearly crazy.  But who’s that woman?  And why is she walking straight at Jay?  Uh oh.

Take a look behind you kids, before we go in for A Closer Look.

Villain: This is a tricky one… I’d call it a ghostly apparition, visible only to cursed people, that is seeking to kill them.

How Do I Stop It?: If I’m being honest, just pray that you don’t fall victim to this thing.  If you do, you’ve made some bad life choices.  Which leads me to the next point…

Lessons Learned: Be EXTREMELY diligent in understanding who you’re having sex with.  I’m talking lie detector tests. Long Q&A sessions. Anything you need to, so you understand who these people are.  I’m going on record.. The lesson here is to stop being sluts.  And don’t blame me, kiddos.  This isn’t my movie.

Who Do I Watch With?: Anyone over 18.  There’s lots of nekked people in this one, but not in the way that you’re thinking.  It’s not super gory, but it’s certainly creepy.

Movie Trivia: The Theater that is shown in the beginning of the movie is the same theater at which Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell first showed “Evil Dead.” Also, the concept for the film is based on a recurring nightmare that the director had earlier in his life.

Rating the Flick

Villain: 8/10.  It’s so simple, yet so clever.  While the monster seems so non-threatening, the persistence of this thing makes it a true menace.  And that it keeps manifesting itself as different people keeps it fresh for every encounter.

Scare Factor: 7/10.  I’d like to say this was a truly terrifying movie.  And it’s definitely creepy.  As I said, the monster just never quits, and there’s some very good suspense throughout.  But in terms of really keeping you on the edge of your seat, it’s not quite there.  Scary? Absolutely.  But not spine-tingling terrifying.

Gore Rating: Slightly Bloody Machete (2/5)

2_5_machete

Not too much in this one in terms of bloody messes, but there are some disturbing scenes of violence.  The opening death is pretty gruesome, but beyond that I think you’re pretty much in the clear.

Overall Rating: 4/5 Goldfish.  No reason.

goldfish

I definitely enjoyed this film.  This is David Robert Mitchell’s first feature film, and congrats to him for making a pretty clever horror flick.  I’m not sure if it lives up to what the media is saying (too scary for theaters).  Actually I am sure… that’s not true at all.  But this is definitely a fun horror movie, and it’s very non-typical in the genre.  It definitely has the feel of an indie movie, and not a big-budget Hollywood movie.  And wow.  The music.  I think the music was one of my favorite parts of this film.  It’s an amazing homage to 1980’s horror music, and it’s perfect for the theme of the movie.  All in all, “It Follows” delivers a fun, spooky time at the theaters.

So there you have it.  If you’re looking for a good scary movie, “It Follows” likely won’t let you down.  I definitely recommend checking it out in theaters, but I think this one could easily be enjoyed at home once it’s released on DVD.  Another good point of note is there were some solid horror trailers at the beginning of this, so there are more scares on the horizon!  And spring is upon us, which means the Amusement park side of this blog might be getting some action as well.  So stay tuned for all things scary.  And please feel free to leave comments!

Until next time, watch your back.

-Dvo

A Look in the Mirror

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on December 22, 2014 by dtrain1008

oculus

Oculus

Ah, yes. Come closer, my friends. The doors to the Cathedral have been opened once again, likely for the last time in 2014. The year’s end, as well as the holiday season, are upon us. But even in the cheeriest time of year, there is always time for some fear. So let’s get down to business.

Last night I watched Oculus, a film by Mike Flanagan, who is more or less a newcomer to the feature-length horror genre. I remembered seeing trailers for this movie last year, and thinking it actually looked pretty scary. For whatever reason, I missed it in theaters. We’ll go with laziness I guess. In any case, I was glad to finally watch it.

I must admit, I went through a quasi-roller coaster of anticipation in the first minutes of pushing play. I was excited for a good horror movie. But then as the movie started, I saw that this was not only an MTV Films production, but also a WWE (yes, the wrestling entertainment company) film. Those are generally major red flags for me. But at that point I was pretty committed, so onward I went.

Oculus is the story of two siblings who survived, and are still coping with, a horrible time earlier in their lives. The younger brother is just now being released from a mental institution; reasons of his stay there are soon hinted at… Anyway, as he leaves, there to greet him is his older sister, who is now a successful antique dealer. She sets him up with some money from their family’s estate, as well as a place to stay. But then she informs him that she’s found “it.” “It” being an antique mirror that she had promised him that they would confront later in life.

She reminds him that the mirror was the real reason he’d spent most of his life institutionalized, and was set on proving that there were supernatural forces tied to it. But he’s older and more educated now. Supernatural mirrors don’t exist; he was just the victim of mental anguish… right? But as they start their experiments with the mirror, things already aren’t what they seem. As we look deeper into the past, and continue in the present, there is a very sinister side to this mirror, and a horrible past begins to repeat itself. Oh noes!

Let’s put a shroud on that mirror and go in for A Closer Look.

Villain: An antique mirror that serves as a conduit for evil spirits

How Do I Stop It?: Just by being near this thing you’re playing with some serious fire. Get away from it, and quick. And particularly if it’s in your house, get it out.

Lessons Learned: I mean… this whole movie is one big lesson learned. If you had a horrific event earlier in life, and barely came away alive, DON’T TRY TO CONFRONT THAT EVIL AGAIN. Women. UGH. There’s really a lot of poor decisions here. Their methodology for destroying the evil is beyond absurd. Wild idea: call in some help! No, never mind, you’re right. Bringing in your recently-released-from-the-asylum brother is all the help you need. [facepalming as hard as I can]

Who Do I Watch With?: I think this is a very well-rounded flick. There’s some icky gory scenes. There’s some really creepy creatures lurking about. But it’s not extremely adulterated. So get a mature friend who’s ready to commit to some scares and enjoy the trip.

Movie Trivia: During the auction where the mirror is sold, the auctioneer mentions that the mirror was acquired from the Levesque Estate. WWE Superstar HHH’s real name is Paul Levesque and WWE Studios is one of the producers of this film. Well played, Vince McMahon.

Rating the Flick

Villain: 8/10. I know what you’re thinking. A mirror? The mirror itself isn’t very intimidating. But the way it’s able to manipulate our protagonists’ minds, as well as manifest some really creepy characters, makes this a pretty awesome villain.

Scare Factor: 8/10. This movie got me for sure. There’s a whole lot of suspense, a good amount of “gotcha” moments, and overall does a good job of keeping you on edge. Pretty solid stuff.

Gore Rating: Moderately Bloody Machete (3/5)

3_5_machete

The quantity of gory scenes in this one is pretty low. But there’s a few scenes in particular that put me in a state of discomfort, so if you’re not keen on blood, you might have to divert your eyes a few times.

Overall Rating: 4/5 Goldars holding the Mirror of Regret

mirror

Because Power Rangers.  So, wow.  This one really delivered.  This was a very interesting movie.  The director decided to really split the movie between past and present, and he does it very frequently.  To the point where the scenes are quite literally intertwined with each other.  But he does a good job of keeping them separate at the same time, and it works pretty well.  You unravel the dark past of the kids, while also experiencing the present terror simultaneously.  A spooky combo.  So if you’re looking for some end-of-year scares after you’re done with the feel-good stuff, Oculus might be a good choice.

That’s going to wrap up this review, and likely this year.  And wow!  Over three years running on this blog.  I do want to say thanks to everyone who has supported this, just by reading it and giving me occasional feedback.  If you know someone who might be interested in this, please spread the word!  And as always, feel free to leave a comment, and if you haven’t signed up for email updates, be sure to “Unleash Hell” at the top right so you get updates as soon as they happen.  So with 2014 coming to a close, all I’ll say is… See you on the other side…

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

-Dvo